Fun Times in Konoha
by Super Kiba Fan
Summary: Me, the author, and friends have been dragged into Konoha! What will we do while we are there? And yes, death will occur often. Usually to me. I'm scared, mommy! Chapter 6 is now up. Chapter 7 soon to follow. -June 4 2008
1. The Beginning, Bitch!

**Author's Note: Sup. I'm back and writing again, this time with a new fanfic. It's something that me and two of my good friends have been talking about since last school year. And, me and those friends are the main characters in the story, as the explanation thingy said. And I promise, it will be freakin' hilarious. It starts out at my house with me and those friends there, and the story develops from there. I hope you peoples like it!**

End Author's Note.

**Disclaimer: I'm gonna do it myself because… I'M IN THE STORY! And now you will actually know my name! Aha! Well, I didn't create Naruto, Kishimoto Masashi did. And he made it quite wonderfully. Better than I would have. And if I did, Kiba would be the main character and be a freakin' Jounin. So there. **

End Disclaimer.

Fun Times in Konoha

Chapter 1: The Beginning, Bitch!

Josh (the author), Ben and Brendan (Josh's friends) were chilling at Josh's house with nothing good to do. At all. No special fun time events were happening, it was just a boring Saturday afternoon.

"What the fuck, there's nothing to do!" yelled Brendan as he started walking down the stairs into the basement. He was a chubby 16-year-old with a goatee and a mustache and had an average, if not above average height. His hair was blondish and curly.

"We could play video games, you know…" Ben replied, following him. He was shorter and a lot skinnier than Brendan and had brown hair. He looked generally happy all the time, unless he was pissed. He was 15.

"Screw that, let's watch something random on TV," Josh said. He was a little shorter and skinner than Ben and had dirty blonde hair. He was DK mode: had really, really long arms. He wore glasses that were crooked on his head. He grabbed the remote and turned on the TV.

"Your mom's gonna watch something random on TV! Ooh, bitch, you just got jacked, bitch!" said Josh's brother, Ben, as he walked downstairs. He was tall and bigger than the rest of them, but not as chubby as Brendan. He was blonde hair and had a cocky look on his face all the time. He got his laptop and went back upstairs.

"Shut up, Ben." Josh replied.

"Oh, great, Naruto fillers. In English. Whoop-dee-fuckin-doo," Brendan said sarcastically.

"No, not English, in American!!!!" Josh said loudly with his mouth wide open happily and with two thumbs pointed upward. Brendan went over to him and smacked Josh hard on the head. "I deserved that."

"Yes you did."

"Hmm, these fillers suck. Wait a sec, a new episode is starting! And its actually new! Yay!" yelled the younger Ben. He ran up to the TV and tried to give it a hug just fir the hell of it. And right when he touched the screen…

He vanished.

"Whoa, am I high, or did Ben just disappear?" Josh said confused.

"No, it actually happened." Brendan said.

"Hmm, what to do… LET'S GO AFTER HIM!" Josh yelled as he dived into the TV and disappeared as well. Brendan followed.

Ben saw a flash of light and suddenly fell from the sky into a tree. He remarkably caught himself on a branch and sat on it. He looked around the area and saw a dirt road that was completely empty. It led far off into the distance into a forest.

He then heard a sound that sounded like this:

"Yeah!!!!!!!!! LET'S DO IT!!!!!"

He immediately looked up and saw Josh diving down at him. He fell directly on him and they both slammed down hard on the ground. Josh got up immediately and helped Ben up.

"Where the hell are we?" asked Ben. He thought for a little with Josh and then thought of it. "Are we in the show?

"Maybe. But where's Brendan? He followed me in here and he's not falling from the sky." Josh said.

"I'm right here, dumbass." Brendan said as he walked towards them from the road. "I came in here from like 50 yards down the road."

"Okay, well that's that." Josh said. "But hey, do you here something?"

"No." Ben and Brendan said looking at him weird.

"I swear I heard some foot-" Josh said, and then it happened.

A shuriken came out of nowhere and hit Josh in the head and he fell over.

"DUDE! WHAT THE HELL?!" Brendan yelled, staring at the unconscious Josh.

End Chapter.

How do you like it? Review away and I'll hopefully have another chapter in at most a week!


	2. The Finding of the Village in the Leaves

**Disclaimer:**

**Brendan- Sup. Naruto was not made by Josh, it would have been retarded if he did. It was Kishimoto Masashi. So there. Bitch.**

End Disclaimer.

Fun Times in Konoha

Chapter 2: The Finding of the Village in the Leaves

"DUDE! What the hell?!" Brendan yelled, looking at the unconcious Josh.

Josh was bleeding pretty severely from the head, and he was probably dead.

"Well, he's dead. Don't worry about it, it's probably a dream. But, where the hell's that ninja?" Ben asked and looked around.

::In the skys::

A godly, shining white figure white a thick white beard that fell down all the way past his knees and almost to the end of his white robes was sitting at a table filled with dice. He was thinking about something and reaching for a 20-sided die.

"Time to roll Ben's spot check!" he said. (DND reference)

It rolled around the shining white table and came to a 1.

"Damn it! Crit fail! Now for Brendan's..."

He rolled the die and came to a 16.

"There we go! He saw the ninja! What now, bitches?" he said.

Author- Yeah. This is how God makes things happen. It's true, ya know.

::back down with Ben and Brendan::

Ben tried to look, but ended up tripping himself somehow and looked at the dirt on the ground. Brendan, on the other hand, saw the ninja and ran straight for him. The ninja was surprised that Brendan saw him and reached for his katana. Brendan got to him before he got the sword out and he punched him hard in the face and he fell over.

::Final Fantasy Victory Music plays::

Brendan defeated Level 3 Konoha ninja! Brendan gained 350 experience points! Brendan grew to level 2 fatass! Brendan found 19 shuriken, 20 kunai, and a katana. Put in inventory!

"What the hell was that sound? And I'm not a fatASS, I'm just fat!" Brendan yelled.

Ben got up and went up to Brendan and the knocked out ninja. He saw the headband with a spiral and the little triangle thingy and knew that it was a Konoha headband. Brendan took the katana and waved it around.

"Cool, I'm keeping this. Ben, you take the throwing crap." Brendan said. Ben took the 'throwing crap' and the pouch and put it on. He also took the headband and put it on.

"I think we should go to Konoha and try how the hell we got here. Plus, I want to se Shikamaru, it's gonna be freaking awesome!" Ben said.

Brendan agreed and said, "What about Josh? He's kinda dead. What should we do with his body?"

"Just put it somewhere hidden in the forest. We can come back and get it."

"True. Now let's go."

They headed down the road that had a sign in front of it that said, "THIS WAY TO THE VILLAGE HIDDEN IN THE LEAVES". They walked for a while, evading random ninjas randomly wandering around. Finally, they got to a gate and a ninja walked up to them.

"What is your buisness here?" he said.

"We are here to come into the Ninja Academy. We are a little old, but that's fine, we just want to learn ninja skillage. I already got a headband, my friend here didn't get one yet. Can we come in? Ben explained.

"Yeah, we're just ninjas in training." Brendan said.

"Sure, come in. You guys got to go to the Hokage's office to get in the academy." He gave them a map and pointed the way.

::A while away::

"Where the hell am I?"

Josh woke up in the middle of the road. He didn't really wake up, he kinda just appeared.

"Wait, where are Ben and Brendan? They must have gone to Konoha! I'm going there to! Yahoo!" he yelled and ran down the road.

End Chapter!!!

How'd you like it? Review and I'll be back with another chapter soon!


	3. Meeting the Ninjas

**Disclaimer:**

**Ben- Hey homies. Naruto wasn't created by Josh- I mean SKF. Kishimoto Masashi did. Now time to smoke some mary-jane! Just kidding.**

End Disclaimer.

Fun Times in Konoha

Chapter 3: Meeting the Ninjas...And Getting a House!

Ben and Brendan followed the random guard ninja's directions and went towards the Hokage building. They walked in the door and went up to the ninja standing in front of the huge door to what they knew as the Hokage's Office.

"Hey, can we see the Hokage regarding us getting into the Ninja academy? We are 15 and 16, but we want to be ninja-like and be able to kill people! A-and be able to protect people... that too." Ben said.

"Uh, sure. Just wait a moment. He is in a meeting regarding the next chuunin exams taking place in a month. He is assigning chuunins and jounins to run it." the ninja in front of the door replied. He walked inside and in a couple minutes, many people walked out of the room. With them, the ninja at the door remerged and said, "The Hokage wants to see you two now. He seems a little eager to see two new students wanting to join our academy."

They followed the ninja into the room and looked around. It was huge. Fancy stuff littered the walls and the desk was remarkable and huge. They didn't believe that they were actually in the office that they had seen so many times on television.

"So, you two are the new students? What are your names?" The Hokage asked them.

"I'm Ben and this is Brendan. We come from a country far away from here," Ben said. Brendan nodded in agreement.

"Nice to meet you two. I'm sure you can join the academy. You will join not with the younger people, but with the oldest of the bunch. The one with Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke. You will receive your headbands in a couple days and start in four days. In the mean time, you can find a house. There is an apartment complex east of here you can live in. Now go off. I have business to attend to." he said.

They left the building, and right when they went out, Josh saw them and ran up to them.

"Hey guys! What have you been up to?" Josh asked them.

"...Weren't you dead a couple hours ago?" Brendan asked with a weird look on his face.

"I was?"

"Yeah, you were."

"Well, now I'm alive. How'd I die?"

"You got shurikened in the head. It was pretty funny." Ben said.

"Oh. It's weird to know I was dead a couple hours ago. But that doesn't matter now. What were you guys doing in there?" Josh asked.

"Becoming ninjas." Ben said.

"Cool! I want to too!" Josh exclaimed.

"Go ahead. Just ask him and he'll put you with all the main characters." Brendan said.

And Josh ran off and in about five minutes, he came back out and had a headband.

"Yay, I'm a ninja!" he yelled.

"Shut up Josh." Brendan and Ben said.

"Okay..." Josh said, putting his head down.

"Well let's go get a house." Ben said.

And they did.

They got an apartment. It was right next to Naruto's, but they didn't know that yet. And Josh won't notice for a while because he's oblivious.

In a couple days, they got their ninja gear and explored the village. They didn't find any of the main characters, though. But they did see the ramen guy! And the ramen was the best ramen ever. EVER.

Then, they went to ninja academy. They started to walk there.

"Hey, shouldn't we be looking for a way home?" Josh asked them on the way there.

"No, Dorothy, being in Naruto is freaking awesome. It's better than school anyway. So fuck going home." Ben said.

"Oh, okay." Josh responded. And no one talked again walking to the academy.

They arrived at the academy and went into the class. Iruka introduced them.

"Hey class, we have three new students today, they come from a far away place, and they're 15. Introduce yourself." Iruka said.

"Sup, I'm Josh."

"I'm Ben."

"And I'm Brendan. How you doin?"

"Anything else you want to say?" Iruka asked.

"Nah, not really." they responded.

"Okay, well sit wherever you want."

Josh sat next to Kiba and Shino (of course), Ben sat behind Shikamaru and beside Ino and Sakura (in between them), and Brendan sat in a corner all by himself because he's a loser.

He sat behind Naruto, Lee, and Neji.

They listened to Iruka talk about ninja stuff and all the types of jutsus. Josh paid no attention and slept most of the time (Shikamaru was behind him and he was sleeping too), and Ben was half-listening and Brendan was completely listening. Soon, lunch began and the head to the dining area place.

Josh and the others sat near Kiba, Shino, Shikamaru, and Chouji. Josh started the conversation.

"What was he talking about in there? I was sleeping, I wouldn't know." he said.

"Listening is troublesome." Shikamaru said.

"He went over types of jutsus. Simple shit." Brendan said.

"You got that right! We go over that stuff a lot! It's easy!" Kiba yelled.

They talked about more random crap that I don't feel like typing right now and then lunch ended and the day ended. They walked home and had another conversation.

"So, do you think we can use jutsus? Cause that be cool as shit." Josh said.

"I dunno. We can try in the field that everyone trains in." Brendan said.

"Let's go!" yelled Ben, excited-like.

End of Chapter.

Review! Please!


	4. Special Skills?

**Disclaimer- I don't own Naruto, blah blah blah blah blah. Don't feel like making it funny at the moment.**

End Disclaimer.

Fun Times in Konoha

Chapter 4: Special Skills?

Brendan, Ben, and Josh were walking towards the field where everyone trains and stuff. They were wondering if they got any special abilities or justus when the came into the world of Naruto, because if they didn't have any they'd probably get the shit beaten out of them by any ninja. Yes, including Tenten.

When they got there, they discovered Lee doing an insane amount of push-ups in the middle of the field.

"9996... 9997... 9998... 9999... 10000! Yeah!" Lee yelled, jumping up from doing his push-ups.

"Dude Lee! We just got out of class literally ten minutes ago! There's no way you did 10000 push-ups!" Ben replied to his counting.

"Fine, I only did 1000. Happy now?" Lee replied.

"Fine."

"It is fine."

"That's what I just said."

"You want to fight about it?" Lee asked, getting into his fighting stance.

"Actually, no. I don't. I know Josh does though." Ben said.

"I do? Wait, you're playing with my mind again! No I don't! Fuck you!" Josh yelled.

"You confuse me. I'm leaving." Lee said. And he left to leave the entire field all to Brendan, Ben, and Josh.

"Hmm..." thought Brendan, "How are supposed to figure out if we got any jutsus if we don't know how to trigger them?"

"We could have a montage!" Josh said.

"THIS ISN'T THE ROCKY MOVIES, JOSH. SHUT UP." boomed the gods up above.

"Ohh..." Josh said, putting his head down.

"But seriously now, and I know you can't do that, Josh, so stay quiet, how are supposed to trigger them?" Brendan asked.

Josh tried to say something, but when he did, Ben threw a rock at his head and he got knocked out.

"K.O.!" boomed the gods from above.

"Seriously, where do those voices come from?" Ben asked into the sky. The clouds moved as normal and didn't respond, though he did hear so faint booming whispers. (No that wasn't supposed to make sence.)

"Back to the subject, maybe we are supposed to make up something in our heads and it comes true!" Brendan said.

"That sounds stupid, but it's just crazy enough to work! It is SKF writing this fic you know." Ben said.

"Who's SKF? And what fic?" Brendan asked.

"I don't know, something made me say it. It was weird." Ben responded.

"Alright, let me try something. Throw a rock at me." Brendan said.

Ben agreed and picked up a decent sized rock and chucked it as hard as he could at Brendan. Brendan got into a defencive stance and as soon as the rock got near him, he yelled, "Aura Break!" and spun around. A gust of wind, at least that's what it looked like, went around Brendan and shot the rock away. It flew in the air, and fell out of the air and hit the K.O'd Josh in the head. He woke up because of it. He jerked up and put his hands in front of him.

"What was that? What happened? Where am I?" he asked frantically.

"Brendan relected a rock with an 'Aura Break' as he called it and it hit you in the head. It was pretty funny." Ben said.

"Yeah it was." Brendan said. "We all got some kind of special jutsus coming into this world, I guess. I got Aura Break for a defensive jutsu I guess."

"Alright, let me try something!" Josh yelled. He did a backflip and then punched the ground, yelling, "Arise, chicken, arise!" Out of the ground, a rabid chicken appeared and got ready to attack something. Josh said, "Dismissal!" and the chicken disappered.

"...What the hell kind of justu was that?" Ben asked.

"Summoning jutsu. I summon chickens!" Josh answered.

Brendan looked down and shook his head. "Perfect. Josh summons chickens. What else can you do, create pies and throw them at people?" he asked.

"No, that's just stupid, that's not a good attack at all. Unless it was an exploding pie. Now, that would be freaking awesome." Josh replied.

"Now I'm gonna try something." Ben said. He did signs that are actual signs used in the show and yelled, "Dragon Breath: Fire!" and open his mouth and magical fire bursted out of his mouth. "Cool, I didn't think that would work. I don't want to try any other of the breaths right now, it might wear down my chakra." he said.

"That was the coolest out of the ones we did by a long shot." Josh said. "I'm gonna try something else! And it WILL be worth it!"

"Don't do it Josh..." Ben and Brendan said, but he was already doing it. He ran at full speed and did signs. He kept running and yelled, "Kamikaze attack!!!!!" and he exploded and nothing was left.

"God dammit Josh! You blew trees! And killed yourself! But more importantly, look at the trees!" Ben yelled.

"Don't worry, he'll be back next chapter." Brendan said.

"But what about the trees?"

"What are you, a hippie? You don't care about trees."

"Oh, right. Sorry. Let's go back home." Ben said. And they walked away, hoping that they won't get arrested for blowing up half the field.

End of Chapter.

Review!!! I'll be back with a new one at the start of next week, maybe tomorrow if you're lucky!


	5. Old New Friends and The First Mission

**Disclaimer- I don't own Naruto. Masashi does. I own Shonen Jumps with Naruto manga in it, but I do not own the anime or manga.**

End Disclaimer.

_Author's Note: In response to my 4 month absence, I am typing another chapter of Fun Times in Konoha. This will be longer than usual, and will be quickly followed by another chapter by this weekend. Read and enjoy._

End Author's Note.

Fun Times in Konoha

Chapter 5: Meeting New Old Friends and the First Mission

Ben, Brendan, and Josh (yes, he's back alive again) were just chilling in their apartment in Konoha. It was about three weeks after they had burnt up the training field that they discovered their new moves in. They were playing Texas Hold 'Em along with Kiba and Shikamaru. Ben and Josh were in the lead. Kiba pretty much had what he started with, Brendan lacked some, and Shikamaru was asleep and everyone considered him out and his chips were in the pot for the next hand.

"Oh yeah! Four of a kind!" Josh said. Brendan and Kiba were already out of this hand and Ben yelled, "Fuck!" right after Josh laid his hand out. Ben threw his cards down and it was a King and a Queen. He had a straight, Nine, Ten, Jack, Queen, King, but Josh had four of a kind sevens. Josh took the pot.

"Damn it, I give up," Brendan said. Everyone else agreed and Josh gladly took their money.

"I gots some monies…. I gots some monies…. " Josh started singing.

"Well, I'm going. I'll carry Shikamaru away." Kiba said, picking up Shikamaru and throwing him over his shoulder.

"Bye." they all said.

"Damn it, there's nothing to do. I want to fight some people." Ben said.

"Hey, we actually get assigned a mission tomorrow. We might want to get equipment and shits today to prepare. We have no idea what we're going to do, ya know." Brendan explained.

"Yeah, and with 'our' extra money we got, we can afford it. And as in 'our', I mean 'my'." Josh said, waving the money in front of his face.

"Alright, let's go." Brendan said. They head out, but right as they did, the door next to them busted open and Naruto flew out of it. He did the rail and fell on the ground, and Sasuke walked out of it.

"Heh, looks like I win again, Naruto. We are now 26-26. And if you don't know what that means, it means we're tied," He said with a giant grin on his face. He jumped off the railing above Naruto and landed and then ran away.

"What a jackass," Ben, Brendan, and Josh all said simultaneously.

"God damn it, my back…" Naruto whined.

"You'll be okay, sissy," Brendan said as he helped Naruto up.

"Thanks," Naruto responded. "He got a cheap shot on me, the douche. He just came in from the window and slammed my head against the ground and threw me out the door. That's how he's attacked me like 15 times."

"Maybe you should, you know, lock your window?" Josh suggested.

"Oh yeah! That would work! Thanks!" Naruto exclaimed.

"What an idiot…" Ben whispered under his breath.

They continued walking around the village, searching for the shop, but then they realized that they had no idea where it was. Then they randomly found a map of the town on the ground and they found where the shop is. They, obviously, went to it.

They ventured inside the shop and an old guy was sitting, reading some book. When the trio walked in, he quickly put the book under his desk and stood up.

"Welcome, what do you need?" he asked.

"Weapons and stuffs. If you don't mind, please be quiet while we look around," Brendan said.

"Alright then," the shopkeeper said as he sat down and took out his book. Josh saw it and identified it as "Make Out Paradise."

"God, I guess all adult men read that book," Josh said to himself.

They searched throughout the whole store, and Josh found exactly what he wanted.

"Cool, two tonfa, a shit load of shuriken, and a bow with arrows. Exactly what I want," Josh said.

Josh bought the weapons, and then waited for Brendan and Ben to get stuff. Brendan got kunai because he already got a katana, and Ben got a ninja-to and a rapier. They left after that.

Then, they went to the burnt training field, which wasn't burnt anymore because they are in an anime. They practiced throwing weapons/ shooting at trees and brawled with weapons against each other. They all were pretty good.

SKIP TO NEXT DAY!

Brendan, Ben, and Josh woke up and ran to the field, where they were supposed to meet the mission provider. Kakashi stood there, along with another guy and a floating head. The three guys recognized them.

"Zack? Kyle? How'd you guys get here?" Ben asked.

"We went to Josh's house, you know, through the table at lunch, and we noticed the TV had Naruto on it. Then, we saw you guys playing cards and going to the weapon shop and stuff. So we came in, became ninjas, got weapons, and met up with Kakashi and decided to accompany you guys on a mission." Zack explained. He was a slightly chubby (not as chubby as Brendan), black-haired 15 year-old with a giant sword and a bow on his back. "And yeah, as you can see, the TV had technical difficulties when Kyle came in and he lost his body. But what's amazing is that he's living. And floating."

"Yeah. Zack's carrying a dagger that I can wield with my teeth. It's pretty cool," said the floating head, known as Kyle. He also had black hair and had glasses. He had shortish hair.

"Well, anyway, your mission is simple. Go on the trail going north and stop a shipment of different supplies going to a band of ninjas trying to attack our village," Kakashi I don't know why they originally only wanted three 16 year olds to do it, but if there's five of you, you should be able to handle it. Just don't get caught by the evil guild of ninjas, that wouldn't be good. After you get the supplies, take them back here. Here's a map," he gave the map to Ben, "the guild is located around the northwestern area of the forest, and according to our knowledge, they should be going along the road going south and then west right….here. They should meet right off of that road."

"Thanks, Kakashi. We're gonna go now." Josh said. And they headed out.

They walked along the trail for a long time, talking about random and irrelevant things. One of these things was this.

"So, Kyle, how the hell are you living and floating and everything, you know, with your heart in your body and you being not connected to your body and all?" Ben asked.

"Well, this is an anime, so things just work out this way. But I have to wait for my body to appear in this world to go back or else I'd probably be dead." Kyle responded. "On the other hand, me floating is because I cast Fly on myself. Apparently, I have magic here. Which is pretty awesome."

"Nice! What other spells do you have?" Josh asked.

"I don't really know, the fly spell just kind of happened, it's weird," answered Kyle.

They continued along the path, for a total of about 6 miles. Brendan, being fat, was tired.

"Damn it, I hate walking. Why do we have to walk? I wish I was like Kyle and could just float around as a head. Lucky son of a bitch," Brendan said.

"Hey, wait a second, Kyle's not a son of a bitch, I am," Zack said.

"That is true," agreed Kyle, Ben, and Josh.

Brendan walked up a hill to lay down. When he got to the top, he saw people walking with carts down the southern road. They then turned west and headed up that road.

"Hey, guys, I saw the people we're after." Brendan said to the rest of them.

"Alright then, let's go follow them." Josh replied. Everyone agreed and they went into the forest to hide while following them.

The merchants walked along the road quietly, but none of them seemed to notice the group of five following them. Soon, the merchants stopped for a break.

"So, should be charge in there and kill them, persuade them to give us the supplies, or shoot them from here?" Zack asked the group.

"I say we shoot them from here, charging in would give them a chance to kill us, and I really don't think persuading them would work. We don't have money! Well, anymore, we don't have money anymore." Josh said.

"I'll through kunai at them." Brendan said, pulling out a couple kunai.

"I'm ready to attack." Ben said, pulling out some shuriken.

"Well, I agree with attacking them from long range, but what should I do?" Kyle asked.

"Be a distraction. Go up there and fly around." Ben suggested.

"That sounds like a good idea." Josh agreed. Kyle sighed and took the dagger from Zack's belt and started going towards the merchants.

Kyle flew around a wagon and saw two merchants talking and playing cards, and seeing no other merchants around. He flew up to one of the merchants and slit his throat. The other merchant got up from his chair quick, making the chair fly backwards and he called for the other merchants to come. There seemed to be about twenty of them. They held many different types of swords, but a scimitar, for some reason, was the most common weapon the had. Kyle then flew around randomly away from the merchants, putting them in view of the other four.

"Alright, let's shoot/throw shit at them!" Josh yelled quietly.

They started firing, and quickly six of the merchants went down. The merchants noticed the arrows, shuriken, and kunai coming from the trees. They focused more attention on the shooting people than Kyle.

"Alright, time to go in! YAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!" yelled Brendan as he put away his kunai and charged with his katana. Josh, Zack, and Ben quickly followed with their melee weapons out, except Zack who was clenching his on his back.

Brendan met the first merchant and easily cut him down with a quick slash down the chest. He then turn around and stabbed another merchant in the shoulder, and then pushed his head into the ground. Two merchants quickly confronted him and attacked. The first one lost balance and fell and the second one was blocked by Brendan's katana. He pushed his sword back and slashed his side, bringing him down.

Josh, Zack, and Ben ran in behind Brendan, and Josh quickly hit two merchants about to attack him in the face. They grasped the faces, which gave Ben time to stab one of them with the ninja-to and the other with his rapier. Zack unsheathed his sword, and quickly cut a guy in half.

"Holy shit, that's a huge sword!" one of the merchants yelled.

Then, suddenly, a man wearing green scrubs and with black hair walked out of nowhere and said, "Know what else is a big sword?" and pointed with his hands to his pants.

"The Todd? What the hell are you doing here?" questioned the group of five.

"No idea. All I know is that my job is to say sexual phrases," answered The Todd.

"You mean sexual innuendos?" asked Josh.

"In your endo." The Todd answered. He then walked away.

Ben shrugged off The Todd and stabbed the merchant who tripped himself in the throat, and then stabbed the one who was stabbed in the shoulder in the throat. He was then slashed in the back by another merchant, whose face was then broken by a crushing hit by Josh's tonfa. The remaining five dropped their weapons and backed up.

"Okay, we don't know who you are, but we give up! Don't kill anymore of us! Just tell us what you want and we will give it to you!" one of the merchants said.

"We want your children." Kyle said.

"Kyle, shut up. We really want those wagons you are delivering," Ben said.

"Umm… if we do that, we'll probably get killed by either our consumers or our boss…" said the merchant.

"We don't care. Either we kill you and take the wagons or you don't get killed by us and do something else. Run away somewhere, just not back to the merchant place or back to the evil ninja guild you were delivering to," Josh said.

"We weren't delivering to ninjas. They aren't actual ninjas, their just rebels from the Sand Village. They are after them, cause the have stolen stuff from it." the merchant said.

"Oh, thanks for the information. Now leave before we kill you," Brendan said. The merchants ran off.

The group took the wagons and brought them to the Hokage. They were thanked and given a supply of weapons and food (because they can give it to them). They started walking away from the Hokage's office, not really knowing where they were going.

"How's your back, Ben?" Zack asked.

"It's fine, I only got nicked a little." Ben responded.

"Well that was fun. I got to bash someone's face in." Josh said.

"Sure, I guess." Brendan responded.

"What do you want to do know?" asked Ben.

"Train? Figure out more techniques we have?" Kyle said.

"Sure." Everyone agreed.

They went to the field that everyone knows about and decided to try to create their own jutsus. Zack already had an idea when he got there.

"Alright, step back." he said. He took out his sword and quickly spun around with it. The sword created a shock wave coming off of it. Josh and Kyle did not back up enough, but Kyle just floated over it. Josh got shocked and was flung backwards.

"Ah… my head…" Josh said.

"You'll be fine, Josh." Brendan said.

"My turn," Kyle said. All he did was back up a little in the air, and then go forward very fast. His head had fire all around it.

"That was pretty cool," Ben said.

"Well, we saw a little of what you guys can do, so let's just go back to the house," Josh said. And they did.

_**END OF CHAPTER 5!!!!!**_

Chapter 6 should be out by this weekend! Review and please be patient for the next chapter!


	6. Complete Randomness 1

**Disclaimer: Brendan: Sup. SKF does not own Naruto, he just watches it and reads it and likes reading and writing fanfics about it.**

End Disclaimer.

Fun Times in Konoha

Chapter 6: Complete Randomness One

Brendan, Ben, Josh, Zack, and Kyle were just sitting around the apartment, eating and waiting to receive their next mission. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Josh jumped up and answered the door. A delivery guy was there with a package.

"Hello, I have a package for Kyle." said the delivery guy.

"Well I got a package for that chick." the Todd said as he emerged for behind a counter.

"Todd, there isn't any women here!" Brendan said.

"Well, it's still funny, right?" the Todd asked.

"Just go, Todd. Just go." Zack said. The Todd left.

"Thanks," said Josh, ignoring the Todd. "Kyle, you got a package. I'll open it."

Josh opened and inside was…

Legs.

"Kyle! You're legs came in the mail!" Josh yelled.

"What about the rest of my body?" Kyle asked.

"They didn't come."

"Damn it."

Kyle's legs jumped out of the package and walked towards the head. "At least now I can kick people," he said.

"Wait a sec, you also got one of your arms!" Josh yelled.

"What the hell am I going to do with an arm that isn't attached to my body?" Kyle asked.

"Here, I got it." Zack said. He grabbed the arm from Josh's hand and slammed the end of it on Kyle's cheek. It stuck there.

"You look… fantastic. Just great. We have a head with an arm attached to its cheek and his legs. Just fantastic." Brendan sighed.

Then, there was another knock at the door. Josh got up and answered it again. Some random ninja was there.

"Who the hell are you and what do you want?" Josh asked.

"There's a weird magical ray coming down from the sky to the north of here. You might want to check it out. That's all I heard. Goodbye." the ninja said.

"Hey guys, there's apparently a weird ray to the north, and a ninja wants us to check it out. I say we go." Josh said.

Everyone agreed and they went north. After like thirty minutes, they found a giant ray that didn't seem harmful. It was very wide and radiant and was darker blue.

"I call dibs jumping into it first." said Josh.

"Who said we were jumping into it?" Ben asked.

"No one did. I just want to." Josh replied. And he ran and jumped into the ray. He disappeared into it. The remaining four waited, looking at each, trying to figure out what the hell just happened to Josh.

"Did he teleport home or what?" Kyle asked.

"It might be a portal, but we're probably not going to find out unless we jump into it too." Brendan replied.

But he was wrong. Suddenly, the sky flashed and Josh reappeared…but not as Josh. He was now a pale-green human-sized dinosaur with one weird wandering eye and another normal eye that was on the other side of his face, just four inches higher than the other one. His mouth was full of sharp teeth and a long tongue hung out of his mouth. He had claws now and had huge scaly feet with long, sharp toes. He had a very long tail that had spikes that were not organized by size at all. And, his speech seemed to be a little different.

"Mreh." screeched the changed Josh.

"Great, he went into his veloceraptor form," Brendan sighed.

"You mean his retarded veloceraptor form," Zack corrected him.

"Well, it obviously transforms you into an 'improved' form," Ben said.

"I'll go next, maybe I'll get my body!" Kyle said as he floated into the giant ray of transformation. His legs followed him into it. The veloceraptor form of Josh (I will now refer to it as the veloceraptor) waddled towards Ben, saying "Reh" after each step, turned around, and watched the floating head and the legs of Kyle go into the giant ray of transformation with wide eyes.

After about a minute, there was another flash and Kyle's head and legs appeared, but they were not attached. The only difference was that there was a cannon of Kyle's head, there was a golden sword in his arm, and that his legs had wings.

"Seriously, what the hell?" Ben asked.

"God damn it, just a cannon and a sword? And wings for my legs? What about my body? Please, gods?" Kyle asked the gods.

"Not right now, we'll give it to you in like Chapter 9." the gods replied in the booming voice from Chapter 2.

"Damn it." Kyle responded.

"Now I'm scared what I'll look like. Will I be skinny?" Brendan asked the giant ray of transformation.

"You'll have to come inside me to find out," The giant beam replied.

"Hehe, come inside. That's sexual." Brendan said.

"Hey, I'm supposed to be the guy who points out things that are sexual." said the Todd, who came out of nowhere.

"I'm sorry, it won't happen again." Brendan responded.

"It better not," said the Todd, walking away.

"I call next!" Zack yelled as he ignored the gods, the ray, the Todd, and Brendan talking and dived into the ray.

Again, after a minute, the sky flashed and out came a man with a giant chin and a very wide grin, wearing a Hot Dog Suit and holding a rubber chicken and crotchless earmuffs.

"Hey, it's Random Dude!" Ben, Brendan, and Kyle yelled. The veloceraptor screeched again and jumped twice without bending its knees.

Random Dude ran off to do random things at random times with random people at random places.

"Well, there he goes. Brendan, you're turn," Ben said.

"Fine." Brendan replied, walking calmly with his hands in his pockets into the beam of transformation.

The skies flashed, and all that stuff from before. Brendan reappeared, but he looked exactly the same, but instead of a plain white t-shirt, it was a t-shirt that said 'RESPAWN MAN!!' with the exclamation points and everything on it.

"Cool, Respawn man. That's gonna be a great help." Ben said. The veloceraptor replied with a very elegant "RarograhtriluuRR".

"Damn right, Josh. Damn right." Kyle responded.

"Well, my turn." Ben said and he went into ray of transformation.

The skies flashed as before, and yadda yadda yadda, a squirrel appeared. And it had a walnut and it was going to town on it. The veloceraptor looked at it strange and said "Rururrr?". The veloceraptor reached out and picked up the squirrel, and then put it on its head. The squirrel just sat on its head and finished its walnut. But, as soon as the walnut was finished, a new walnut appeared in its hands and it ate that too.

Suddenly, an explosion bursted towards the south. The veloceraptor perked up and then jolted towards the explosion. The squirrel remained on the head of it, stayed calm, and continued eating the walnut.

"Okay, there goes Ben and Josh. Come on, Respawn Man, let's go." Kyle said.

The Todd came out from behind a bush, said, "Haha, you said come," and ran way.

"Alright, off we go." Respawn Man said, ignoring the Todd.. And they left.

Respawn Man and Kyle arrived at a completely changed portion of Konoha. Modern houses had randomly appeared and planes where flying randomly. Yes, planes. PLANES. People were running around frantically because the whole region of Konoha just suddenly changed into this. They were even wearing modern clothes and such. On one of the planes stood a man with a cowboy hat and wearing a wet suit. He was holding a plastic cow and a piece of pie. They saw the veloceraptor and the squirrel running down a road towards a skyscraper(yes, a skyscraper appeared in Konoha) with a man in a suit and a cape standing on top of it. He was holding a soda and a briefcase.

"Oh great. Random Dude's random juice has seeped into Konoha, and now everything is completely random. The random juices are even getting to me," Respawn Man said.

"I am A Specific Guy! I am here to fight the one called Random Dude in a specific but random form of fighting!" the man on the skyscraper yelled.

"You shall be destroyed, A Specific Guy!" yelled Random Dude from on top of the plane. The plane flew towards the skyscraper and Random Dude stepped off of the plane and in front of A Specific Guy. He took out a glove from his pants and slapped him in the face with it twice. He then put it back it his pants.

"I will best you in combat of some sort, you random evil being!" he said, as he took a sip of his soda. Random Dude slapped the soda out of his hands, and it immediately became a vacuum cleaner and a duck, and the vacuum was slowly going towards the duck, about to suck it up. Dramatic music started playing as the duck just sat there. Then, A Specific Guy grabbed the duck and fused it together with his briefcase and he formed a mug of coffee. He drank it. The vacuum cleaner fell off the skyscraper and exploded, causing three homeless people to be set on fire.

"Well we shall go battle. That's all we have on this report. And now Respawn Man with the weather." Random Dude said. Suddenly, Respawn Man was in a suit sitting at a desk right beside them with a green screen behind him. Kyle was still where he was floating/standing originally, and the veloceraptor was currently climbing up the side of the skyscraper, with the squirrel still on its head. And yes, it was still eating a walnut.

"The forecast is: Sunny! With a chance of brick!" Respawn Man said, pointing to the green screen. It showed a map of Konoha and a swarm of bricks was shown going from the western area and going in a circle into Konoha and then leaving through the south.

Then, a brick fell from the sky and hit Respawn Man in the head, going through his head and he fell down on the table. Then, three seconds later, Respawn Man appeared in his normal Respawn Man clothes next to the desk.

The veloceraptor then reached the top of the skyscraper. It pointed at A Specific Guy and yelled, "Rugurah?". Then, a sparkle came out of its finger.

"Holy crap, the veloceraptor is casting a spell!" Kyle yelled. He was now on the top of the skyscraper as well. His legs flew there with their wings.

Suddenly, a bucket of water appeared right next to the veloceraptor. The veloceraptor stared at it. The squirrel threw a walnut into the bucket of water, and then made a new walnut and started eating it.

"…A bucket of water?" Kyle asked.

The veloceraptor then pushed the bucket over, and the water spilled out and the flowed down the skyscraper. The veloceraptor picked up the bucket and looked inside. He took out a muffin. It smiled with a wide grin.

Some random modern ninja person, who was on the skyscraper because he was eating lunch on it, attempted to take the muffin. He grabbed it, but then the veloceraptor glared evilly at the ninja.

Suddenly everything went black. But, three seconds later, everything came back, but the only change was that the ninja had claw and bite marks all over his body and was laying on the ground very bloody, and the veloceraptor had the muffin back in its hand. It ate it.

"…Right. I think I'm gonna go lay down…" Kyle said.

But, a plane then crashed into Kyle's legs and they exploded.

"Seriously, what the fuck, God?" Kyle yelled to the heavens.

"Your legs were communist, so I had to destroy them." God boomed from above.

"Well, you're right. They did support the Red Party." Kyle responded. No one seemed to notice before that Kyle's pants were red and had the sickle and hammer symbol all over it.

Kyle then floated away into a random building and slept. Yes, he was able to sleep with people running around and screaming and planes crashing into buildings constantly.

After half an hour, all the buildings were destroyed except one very big hospital, all the planes were demolished, and all the people were in the hospital being treated by the doctors of Scrubs and House. (The Todd finally has a use!) Kyle was in the hospital, being treated for a cut on his cannon.

The only things standing outside the hospital were the veloceraptor, the squirrel, a bush, a box, and a tree. The veloceraptor took an interest in a certain shiny circular object on the ground and was staring at it. The squirrel was currently on his 134th walnut of the day.

Then, the object the veloceraptor was staring at exploded. It jumped a little and then looked around for it. Then, it got really mad and turned red. It ran randomly in a random direction. The squirrel was too focused on its walnut to notice this.

Respawn Man walked out of the hospital. He suddenly exploded.

Solid Snake revealed himself from under the box and said, "I planted a mine there. Sorry about that."

Respawn Man respawned and said, "No problem, Snake. What the hell are you doing here?"

"I don't know. I just kind of appeared here." Snake said.

"Well I'm looking for a guy who wears random outfits and does random things in random places and a different guy wearing a suit who is probably fighting the other guy somewhere. Probably in a randomly specific or a specifically random place." Respawn Man explained.

"I think I saw them. They were somewhere that way." Snake said as he pointed to the east.

"Well, I'm also looking for a veloceraptor with a squirrel on its head." Respawn Man said.

"Oh yeah, it got mad and started running in random directions. I accidentally exploded a mine it was took an interest to and it got angry because of it." Snake said.

"Oh, we'll run into it eventually. Well let's go." Respawn Man said.

Voice from above: Solid Snake joined your party!

"What the hell was that noise? Is this turning into an RPG with me as a main character or something?" Respawn Man said in response to the voices.

"What are you talking about? This is no RPG. Well, with that aside, we should go."

Respawn Man agreed, and they walk to the east.

TO A DIFFERENT RANDOM LOCATION!!

Random Dude and A Specific Guy were randomly in Itachi's hideout, which is specific because it is in Naruto. Random Dude was now wearing a shirt that said "I Got Wood", a Styrofoam jacket, and no pants. He did wear underwear though. He was holding a stick that was on fire and a bag of cinnamon buns. A Specific Guy was still wearing a suit, but now it was completely green and was holding a micro-sized briefcase and the mug of coffee from before.

Itachi was sitting on his couch, smoking marijuana and paying no attention to the other two.

"Do you see what you have done, you random evil being! You made Itachi into a hippie, you turned Konoha to a modern city with a high plane crash rate, and you put the hospitals from Scrubs and House together! You also caused characters from other anime or video games to appear here! You must die by the hand of A Specific Guy!" A Specific Guy yelled.

"What do you care? You don't live here. And I think Itachi's better off as a hippie. He doesn't even know we're here." Random Dude responded.

Itachi was currently trying to eat his couch.

"He's trying to eat a couch. That is too random to exist." A Specific Guy said. He then took out a regular-sized gun out of his tiny briefcase and shot Itachi, would fell over.

"And how is pulling out a regular-sized gun from a tiny briefcase not random?" Random Dude asked.

"There is a dimensional hole in my briefcase. DUHH!! You random evil moron." A Specific Guy explained.

"Oh, that makes sense." Random Dude said after he pulled out a sandwich from his non-existent pants and ate it.

TO SOMEWHERE ELSE!!

The veloceraptor was running around aimlessly, destroying anything in its path. It had already destroyed seventeen trees, six homeless people, four people with homes, and Mormon, and a black child. The squirrel sat on its head calmly and ate more walnuts.

BACK TO RESPAWN MAN AND SNAKE!!

Respawn Man and Solid Snake were walking down a random path that was made of yellow bricks for some reason, most likely because of the brick storm that passed earlier, and they were saying nothing. Suddenly, they saw a group of people walking the other way. They couldn't make out who they were though. Snake pulled out two boxes from nowhere, gave one to Respawn Man, crouched down, and put the box over his head. Respawn Man shrugged and followed suit.

End of Chapter!!

Sorry for the slow update. Eh, school sucks. But I'm out now! So more updates, maybe?!

There will be a continuation of this next chapter. I think it should end then, but I haven't typed it yet, so I could be wrong.

But anyway, there's something new I can do with this story!! You can add yourself/ a character to the story! All you have to do is either instant message me or email me your idea for you/your character in the story. You have to describe it. Non-crappily. And there is no guarantee for it making the story. And, if it does make it, it'll probably become a minor character. But, if it's really good, it'll be in every chapter!

So, here's my information:

AIM: SuperKibaFan

E-mail: same as AIM, but at yahoo.

There ya go. Review!!


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